Like any obsessive, all I could think about after the Twin Peaks finale was Twin Peaks. Twin Peaks everything all day every day. How many dreamers are there? What does it all mean? But mostly, what the hell happened to Audrey? Where is Audrey?!
I think I have an idea, but I won’t spoil it for you now. I’ll save that for later. This post doesn’t have anything to do with my theories and everything to do with a random dream that I had a couple of days after the finale of season 3.
This dream actually also happened on the night of a full moon in Pisces and it was an awkward sleep overall. Pisces is ruled by Neptune, which also rules dreams, so I’m not surprised I had a super intense dream on the night of the full moon in this dreamy water sign. That night, I was wired and I couldn’t fall asleep, so I put on my iPod to try and lull me into oblivion. I was thinking about Audrey and what the hell her storyline means. David Lynch is all about dreams (obviously) and meditation. So I figured what better way to access the secrets of Twin Peaks then by dreaming about it? Maybe if I thought about it enough before I fell asleep, I would dream about it and have an epiphany. Maybe I could connect to the mind of David Lynch in my dream state and then I could finally gain some goddamn answers.
It seemed like a great idea at the time. I didn’t uncover any mysteries or hidden meanings – I’m still kind of as confused about the Audrey arc as ever – but I had a wicked insane dream that I’ll always remember.
As I was trying to drift off to sleep, I listened to the song Wild West by Lissie on YouTube – I figured listening to songs off the Twin Peaks soundtrack would make me even more likely to dream about it. I glanced down at my iPod and saw that someone had uploaded the final scene from Twin Peaks – the terrifying scene with the high-pitched shriek and cut to black at the very end of the finale. If I watch this scene, I thought, I’m going to have nightmares. And I was right. Because that was the last thing I watched before finally falling asleep.
The dream was split into two parts. The first part of it was about me becoming friends with Kim Kardashian. I was basically just hanging out at a Hollywood party with Kim K and her friends. And she was so sweet to me. We spoke like we were old friends. She told me about her and Kanye’s wedding and their anniversary.
But the dream would shift between that and being in a house with Audrey with something else. Audrey was freaking out and being rude, much like she was in the most recent season of the show, but she was also legitimately afraid of a monster that was in the house too. It was in the next room. We were in an office with the door closed. Audrey wanted to open the door to face it, but I told her not to because I was afraid.
But she went to open the door anyway and I was so afraid in my dream that I started to try and wake myself up. That happens with me sometimes – if a dream becomes too scary, I’ll try to wake myself up to stop from being too scared. I didn’t wake up though. I just started lucid dreaming. Instead of being in that strange house that Audrey’s in, the dream shifted and we were in my apartment. In my apartment, the bedroom is diagonal to the front door, so much so that when I’m lying in bed I can see it. The eye line that I had was the same in my dream, making me think that what I was looking at was actually real.
Audrey opened the door and the monster was standing near the front door of my apartment. Audrey approached it, slowly, with a fire poker to kill it. I couldn’t see anything other than the shape of this monster because it was dressed in a long black robe with a hood, but I was so afraid of it that I kept telling her to stop. But she kept going because, as she told me, she needed to kill it.
Just as the monster is about to turn towards us, and I know it’s going to let out a scream before attacking up. I keep anticipating it, getting more and more afraid to the point I were I knew I was going to scream too. Finally, it turned to us and it was just a giant E.T. in a robe. E.T. threw his head back and blew out a huge stream of bubbles.
In my dream I started laughing hysterically – harder than I’ve ever laughed in real life – at the sheer absurdity of it all. That Audrey and I would be afraid of E.T. blowing harmless bubbles. I was laugh-screaming so much that that’s how I woke up – screaming in a stage whisper.
I lay in bed for a few minutes recovering. I didn’t uncover any secrets about Audrey, but I feel like I got a glimpse into my own damn mind. Maybe one day I’ll figure out what the hell it all means.